Winter Ribs and Rose

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This past Christmas, I wanted to make a substantial appetizer for our guests to nibble on since I knew my ambitious menu would probably take longer than anticipated. Drunk guests and no food equals mutiny. Of course, an easier solution would be to do a simpler menu but I can't do this because you see I suffer from a condition known as OCED - obsessive compulsive entertaining disorder. In other words, the sight of a Sur La Table or that silky feel of a new All Clad pan gives me the vapors.

People with OCED have this overwhelming need to go over and beyond the call of duty when it comes to entertaining. An OCED sufferer can not throw caution to the wind and serve just any meal but rather the menu must be carefully planned according to an established theme and decided upon after countless hours of research. The condition also causes sufferers to feel a sense of inadequacy if basic items such as dinner rolls, ice cream or chicken stock are not made from scratch. Researchers believe that the driving force behind OCED is a desire to seek approval from dinner guests. Sufferers seem to be addicted to the emotional high they experience after hearing compliments such as, "wow, you are simply amazing", "I can't believe you made this", "you must give me this recipe" or "this is the greatest night of my life". They are often left with a smug sense of satisfaction after conquering a complicated dish, especially one they've never made before or one that involves them purchasing a new piece of kitchen equipment. It is also not uncommon for OCED sufferers to fret about other entertaining issues such as: making sure there are flowers and a matching candle lit in the bathroom, having wooden and never wire hangers available for coats, setting out a designated receptacle for guests to place olive pits in and always serving drinks with cocktail specific napkins and not just regular paper towels.

So you see, my menu had to be executed as planned otherwise the evening in my mind would be doomed to fail. In doing the requisite research for my Christmas menu, I came upon Alton Brown's recipe for oven baked baby back ribs and thought this would be the perfect hors d'oeuvre. While I slow poached the eggs, seared the filet, fried the bacon, mashed the potatoes, roasted the vegetables, deglazed the pan, stirred the grits, made the sauce, sauteed the shrimp and baked the apple cake, pear tart and biscuits, everyone would be distracted with licking barbecue sauce off their fingers. Having lived in Chicago for the last ten years, I'm very well aware of the fact that making ribs in an oven borders on sacrilege but once I became fixated on serving them for Christmas, there was no going back. I had also never made ribs before which of course fueled my desire to give them a go and I was salivating over the hoard of compliments I would receive if they turned out successfully.

Something tells me Alton Brown may also be a fellow OCED sufferer so I trust his recipes. He makes the complicated easy to understand but his cooking methods are often, well, complicated which naturally I find quite attractive. The majority of the online reviews for this particular preparation were overwhelmingly positive but a few people said it was too salty for their tastes. I decided to follow the recipe to the letter with the two exceptions being, instead of just one hour, I marinated the ribs overnight (per the recommendation of my doorman who makes unbelievably good ribs) and I skipped the jalapeno powder because I didn't have any. I was skeptical that the ribs would be finished in two and half hours but they came out moist and tender. I reduced the sauce as instructed but the flavor was way too salty for me, although the meat itself tasted fine. I was able to mitigate the saltiness somewhat by adding ketchup, apple cider vinegar, smoked Hungarian paprika, cumin, honey and more brown sugar but next time around I will either cut the amount of salt in half or forego the reduction and make a separate barbecue sauce instead.

As for the "oohs" and "ahhs" that I was looking for, I'm happy to report that I got what I wanted. My guests really enjoyed the ribs and it was such an awesome experience to eat them on such a cold day. Despite the salt problem, they were really, really good. For many of us, ribs are a summer food but this recipe is a good way to bring a little sunshine indoors. We served the ribs with copious amounts of sparkling wine and Champagne. Sparkling rose in particular did a wonderful job of cutting through the richness and the fruitiness complimented the tangy barbecue sauce quite well.

Eating Good In the Hood has a nice pictorial guide to making this recipe and this video with instructions from Alton Brown is extremely helpful as well.